What the hell is it about Kyla Marie McDonough that has me so fucking smitten? Is that even the write word for it? Smitten? I think I'm way past that now. Okazaki literally just said that I have it bad for Kyla and I think she's right. I'm so into this girl and she doesn't even have a clue.
It would be unfair to ask Kyla to figure out how she feels about me. She hasn't been broken up with that BB girl for very long. She's still messing with her head and emotions with all of her craziness. Kyla is super busy with school and working two jobs and dealing with her family. And to just come out and say "Yes, I know we've been friends for like five or six years or something like that but I like you and want to know if you feel the same" is just bullshit on my part.
This is so damn stupid. I am so miserable over a girl who probably doesn't even feel the same. Like honestly, these feelings are too intense. I sound like a stalker or a weird or freak or something. I'm obsessing over a girl who has never really given me any indication that she feels the same. This is overwhelming and will probably just drive her away quicker. I'm lucky that she still wants to be my friend and I'm fucking pushing it with all of me "feelings" and junk.
This is dumb. I'm done talking about this right now. Too much negative feelings involved with talking about this.
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